Beginner’s Guide to DD/LG

Posted by Devi Moretti on

A DD/LG relationship can be extremely rewarding for all kinds of couples. There are many new and interesting sensations to explore, and it can bring a completely different dynamic to your existing relationship. For someone just finding out about it though, the whole thing can be a little overwhelming. Where do you even start?

By the end of this article, you should hopefully have at least some idea how to get started and be able to start your own journey exploring the wonderful world of DD/LG.

Getting Started with DD/LG

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The first part of getting started is simply making the decision that you want to do it! If you’ve made it to this article, then you’re already part of the way there. This process tends to be much easier for Littles, and if you feel that you enjoy being in “Little Space,” you can try it whenever you like.

Daddies might find it a little more difficult to experience the feelings without being in a proper relationship. You might have some experience to draw on if you’ve already had children, or maybe if you have pets of your own. Most of the time though, the relationship tends to be initiated by the Little.

Once you have found someone who wants to be involved in a DD/LG relationship with you, it’s a simple matter of discussing things! You each need to come to an agreement on what your relationship will involve, how each of you will act, and how often you’ll be in your respective roles. There’ are lots of discussions that need to happen, but it’s very important to get through. Laying out exactly what each of you expects from the relationship makes sure that neither partner is put in any uncomfortable situations further down the line and clears up any misunderstandings before you get started.

Who’s Your Daddy?

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One of the biggest struggles for anyone getting into DD/LG is finding someone else to do it with. You might think this is made a lot easier if you’re already in a relationship but gathering the courage to bring up something like this with your long-term partner can be a big deal in itself. The best thing to do is just be honest and discuss it openly. You never know, your partner might have been thinking the same things and been just as scared to talk to you about it!

For single people, the challenge is a lot bigger. The internet makes our lives a lot easier, as there are many message boards and websites that let you find others who enjoy similar things. All you can really do is talk to people and gather as much information as you can. Along the way, you should meet plenty of people and might even find your ideal Daddy or Little.

Starting Your DD/LG Relationship

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Finding your perfect partner is only the start. The beginning of the relationship is probably the most important phase of it all as it’s when you set out the guidelines you’ll both follow. These are incredibly important and usually take the form of a contract or checklist.

While creating your contract, each partner needs to set out their limits and expectations for the relationships. This includes anything that you definitely don’t want to do, as well as including a safe word that completely stops any sessions as soon as it’s said. Your contract might also include various activities on a scale, rating things that you’ll enjoy as well as things that you’re willing to do even if they aren’t preferred by you.

Most couples will put their contract in writing so that it’s always there for both to see. It helps the dominant partner plan your activities and know which things are off-limits, as well as giving the submissive partner a reference sheet, so if they end up in a situation they’re uncomfortable with, they can refer to the contract. Just because you’ve done it once it doesn’t mean you should never look at it again. You should regularly review your contract to see if anything has changed and updated it where appropriate.

This might seem like a very big deal for what is essentially a bit of roleplay, but it’s incredibly important. Trust is the most important part of any BDSM relationship, so taking time to set out the rules and know that neither of you are going to go too far is a great way to build this trust. Once you get it all out of the way though, it’s a simple matter of trying out your roleplay and having fun!

Suggesting DD/LG to Your Partner

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There’s no easy way to go about this. If you find yourself in a situation where you’re discovering a new part of your own personality, but your partner has no idea, then you’re going to be in an uncomfortable situation. All you can really do is talk to them and try and explain things as best as you can.

One important point to make is to avoid any ultimatum situations. You want to encourage them to join in with your newfound kinks, rather than forcing them to. There are many ways to attempt this. You can simply say “I found this thing that looks interesting”, and gauge their reaction, or try and be more direct about your approach. Whichever method you use, just try to be as honest as possible and always be aware that your partner might not feel the same about DD/LG as you do.

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